Savannah Rose's Birth Day

Due Date: August 31st
Birth Date: August 24th

On the evening of August 23rd, we were celebrating Matthew's 14th birthday and I was glad I had not gone into labor yet! Well, about 7-8pm I started feeling...off...just weird. I wasn't contracting yet, but I knew by the way I was feeling I knew it would be any day now.  We finished up presents, cake, and ice cream and sent the kids to get ready for bed. Alaia and I went for a walk around the neighborhood to see if things were going to pick up and I felt like I needed to move about. While we were walking I had a few contractions, but I'd been having contractions in the evening all week so didn't think much of it. We went back to the house and I still felt really off.  Around 9pm contractions started coming regularly and we decided to time them. After about an hour we noticed they were coming regularly every 9-10 minutes. I decided to do laps around the family room. I just couldn't sit still! The contractions started getting longer and stronger, and eventually were about every 6-7 minutes apart. Around 11, Matt called the midwife to let her know what was going on. I was on the fence about calling her cause I wasn't convinced I was truly in labor yet. Everyone else thought I was, but I took a little more convincing! lol  So, I spoke to Nanci, the midwife, and she said she would be leaving soon and be there in about an hour. Contractions kept coming, I would go between walking laps and squatting and being on my hands and knees. I tried laying down, but again, I just couldn't seem to sit still for very long so resting just wasn't gonna happen! Nanci arrived around 1am. We decided to have her check me and that is where things got interesting! She was having a hard time finding the opening of my cervix. She did eventually find it off to the side! She "walked" it back to the center (OUCH!) and I discovered I was only at 4cm. After 3 previous quick births, this was a new experience for me. Not too long after she arrived Matt ran a bath for me and I got in the tub. It felt so nice and relaxing! I believe around this point Nanci called her assistant to head over. I was still not convinced, btw. I was told there was joking that I would finally believe I was in labor when she was crowing (*ahem* Alaia!) I didn't stay in the tub for long because it seemed to slow my contractions down. I labored a lot hanging in Matt's arms, swaying my hips. Did some squatting and labored on the toilet with a stool. I didn't care for the latter, but I know it helped. I tried getting in the tub again, but it slowed my contractions down, again, so I didn't stay in too long. At some point I asked to be checked again and was upset to find out I was only at a 5! My cervix had moved again, but only a little, and she just "walked" it back to the center. After that I labored a lot on the toilet. After awhile I started feeling a LOT of pressure and almost kinda pushy so we thought I was close. I moved to the bed and we waited for a contraction to hit. And waited. And waited. They slowed way down again once I was on the bed. She checked me and I was still at a 5! We discussed it and she stretched me open to an 8, pretty quickly, too! After that she spent some time stretching me open to a 10 between contractions. At this point I still wasn't feeling the urge to push and contractions were still slowed down, so I asked her to break my water. She checked me again sometime after that and discovered I had a cervical lip. Let me tell ya, that was not fun at all! The assistant had to hold the lip up while I pushed to get her past the cervical lip. After that things started picking up more and I finally got the urge to push! At one point I had to stop because my cervix was coming down with her and they had to get it back in place. After probably about an hour total of pushing, Savannah Rose Florence Wallace was born at home at 8:50am weighing 7lbs 8oz and 22" long.

Even though her birth had it's interesting moments, I loved having her at home! It was a very relaxed environment. I was able to move around as I wanted, interact as much or as little as I wanted, and just do what my body needed to do. I had wonderful support with my midwife, hubby, and Alaia! Even with Matt running on very little sleep in a 2 day period he was awesome and very supportive! Not that I ever spoke in some demon voice, like a certain someone (Alaia) claims I did at one point *innocent smile*

         first bath

         Hungry, hungry caterpillar diaper

       Midwife, Nanci, and Paula, her assistant

Samuel

July 1, 2012 I found out that we were expecting our 4th baby....it had been a long time since I'd told my husband that news!!

September 24, 2012 is the day I found out we had lost our sweet little baby.

I had a routine check up with the OB, but he couldn't find a heartbeat with the doppler. We went in the other room to do an ultrasound. He said sometimes early on it can be hard to find. The ultrasound confirmed my fears though. I was 15.5 weeks along and somewhere around 14 weeks we had lost our baby. I only felt that flutter of a kick once...so light I wasn't 100% sure that is what it was. I decided to do a D&C so it was scheduled for Thursday. I had to come back in the next day so the dr could soften my cervix. That procedure was difficult (and painful) enough to go through let alone what was to come.

September 26th I woke up at 5am in a lot of pain. I took one of the pain pills they prescribed me but it wasn't going away. In fact, it kept coming in intense waves, like labor. I woke up my mother-in-law and she called the doctor. We were to go to the ER and he would do the D&C now. I got ready to go and felt two big gushes. I had been bleeding so thought that is what had happened. I went to see if I needed to change before we left and that is when I lost my son. Freaking out, scared, panicked...we wrapped him up and headed to the ER; the usual 45 minute drive was made in barely 30 minutes. After being given antibiotics, morphine, and I don't remember what all else, the dr tried to get the placenta out naturally. I couldn't handle the pain of that any longer so I was headed to get the D&C after all. A wonderful L&D nurse came in and talked to me and told me we had a boy and he was beautiful. She tried to get hand/foot prints, but he was too tiny :( 

The night before the story of Samuel came to me. At this point, we did not know for sure our baby was a boy, but I knew it was God telling me my son's name and that is what we call him. Samuel. Although I never got to hold him and he never took a breath he is a part of me...our family...and will never be forgotten!

Anyone Have A Spare Crystal Ball?

After reading my friend, Leni's blog, I decided to ramble on about our recent doctor experiences...

Over 2 years ago now, we noticed our son, Matthew, having trouble hearing. We took him to the ENT and got his hearing tested. He did in fact have some hearing issues because he had fluid on his ears, an ear infection, and the fluid was just not going away! So, tonsils and adenoids came out and tubes went in. Fast forward about a year later. We take him in because one of the tubes was not coming out. Doctor took care of it and said there was still a little bit of fluid on his ears. We went for another check up right before we moved here and yep, still some fluid on h is ears. We were told to keep an eye on it. Then we moved to Goldsboro....

A few months ago we were noticing hearing issues again *sigh*  So, to start the new adventure of finding a new doctor we of course had to start with his pediatrician. He told us that he did not see fluid on his ears and they looked normal. Uh huh. We got our referral. So, we took him to the doctor and he has mild hearing loss, his ear drums are recessed, his Eustachian tubes are blocked, and when tested for allergies only one type of grass came up and it is a mild allergy. So, where do we go from here, I asked? My answer? The doctor named off about 3 procedures that could be done, but they don't do them there, and then named one he could do but he didn't sound real sure about it. So, I asked what the chances were of it helping. He told me he didn't know because he does not have a crystal ball. Those were the only suggestions I was given and you could tell he was really stumped. We left and are not going back.

So, I call the ped clinic and speak to a very nice nurse who tells me I can have a whole new referral and take him to UNC. This was the beginning of September. So, I wait and wait and no referral paperwork gets sent. I go to the Tricare office. She can't find it. She finally finds it and it wasn't pushed through or something, so she says she will make sure it goes through this time. Again, I wait and wait. No referral paperwork. I go straight to the Tricare referral office and she finds the paperwork, prints it out for me, and the date on it was from a month earlier and it expires in December. Great! I call to get an appointment and when is the first available appointment? December 19th!! GRRRRRRRR  So, had to make a call and wait a couple days to get called back to get his referral extended, but only for that appointment. For any other appointments I am going to have to go through this all over again. In the meantime, my son still has fluid on his ears and mild hearing loss because a doctor can't give me any answers other than he does not have a crystal ball....

1 month down...

She packs. She moves. She follows. Why? What for? How come? You may think she's lost her mind. Actually, she's lost her heart. It was stolen from her by a man. A man who puts duty first, who longs to deploy, who salutes the flag, and whose boots in the doorway remind her that as long as he is her Military Man, She will remain his Military Sweetheart.

Sick

The flu and all the icky stuff that goes with it....blah...

Girl's Night Out!

Friday night I went out with some girl friends. We went to dinner and bowling afterwards. It was a blast!!! So nice to get out of the house! I definitely need to do that again soon :)

Decorated Today

We don't usually decorate much, if at all, for Halloween.  We always carve pumpkins and the kids dress up, ect but that's about it. This year we decorated. The kids were so excited so that made it all worth it. I'll try to get a pic posted on here tomorrow.

So far, the Lunesta is really helping. I just wish it could help with the missing part :( Some days are good and some days it's not so good....life on an emotional roller coaster.... I love my hubby and I am so proud of him!!!

SLEEP!!

I went to the doctor yesterday and was prescribed Lunesta.  Last night I didn't sleep great, but I slept better than usual and I woke up feeling RESTED!  Sleep is a good thing....  Hoping tonight is even better!

Busy Week!

And I am looking forward to it cause it will make the week fly by!

Tomorrow is my doctor appt. on base for my sleeping issue. I am really looking forward to a good night's sleep!

Thursday is payday. Grocery shopping!! My kids will be happy about that because today I was informed we need grapes and mandarin orange fruit cups. Oh, and gummy bunnies. Can't live without the gummy bunnies! I am also mailing off some boxes to my hubby ♥

Friday I have some party shopping to do and Saturday is Jennifer's Scentsy Party! I am excited! I have some new ideas and I am hoping it goes well :)

There are other mundane household chores and errands thrown in with all that too. I am hoping October stays busy, especially with all the Scentsy parties coming up!

10 Things I Love About Fall

 I love this time of year!! Fall has always been my favorite season!  Here are some of the reasons why :)

1. The leaves changing color

2. The weather starts to cool off

3. Football......specifically the Cowboys!

4. Decorating the house

5. Hot chocolate with marshmallows

6. Pumpkin muffins

7. Debby's "fried" apples

8. Cozy Blankets

9. Comfy Hoodies

10. And of course, the rain! I love the rain in the fall!

I Miss You

I miss those blue eyes
How you kissed me at night
I miss the way we sleep
Like there's no sunrise
Like the taste of your smile
I miss the way we breathe

"I Never Told You" Colbie Caillat 

Energy

I actually have had some energy today! It felt so good! I have still been tired, but not as much. I didn't sleep all that well so not sure where it came from....well, actually, I am sure God sent it to me before I lost my mind ;)

Amazing the things you feel up to doing with energy!

Taking a shower
Getting dressed
Leaving the house
Making dinner
Doing laundry
Doing fun things with the kids

I hope it stays.

Speaking of dinner...

Tonight we did something fun :) Everything we had for dinner started with a C.

Chicken nuggets
Corn
Cheetos (yes they are getting spoiled!)
......... and I have Candy for dessert.........

Wait for Me - Our Deployment Song This Time Around

Not Sleeping :(

Since he left I am not sleeping well *sigh*

I went ahead and made an appt with the dr. on base, but they can't see me until October 6th. That happens to be my hubby's birthday! lol

Update: I got my appt moved to Sept 27th! Yay!

You Know You're A Military Spouse When...

I am borrowing this from another blog (www.ridingtherollercoaster.com) and adding some of my own too! 

Top 10 You Know You're a Mil Spouse When...

10)  You can have a conversation in acronyms.

 9)  You've lived in so many different houses that sometimes it takes a minute for you to remember what your current address is

8)  You're always in possession of an updated power of attorney.

7)  You tear up at the sound of anything patriotic, including but not limited to the National Anthem and Proud to be an American

6)  You spend more time apart from your spouse than together.

5)  Your children were born in different states (or continents).

4)  You can recite your spouse's SSN in your sleep, but you pause when asked for your own.

3)  You rarely celebrate holidays and special occasions on the actual dates those holidays and special occasions fall on.

2)  You only use pencil on a calendar because plans are always changing.

1)  You expect the unexpected.  And somehow that's ok with you.

Mine that I am adding:

- You remember dates and events by deployments and/or places you've been stationed

- You do not go to the commissary on payday unless you absolutely have to!

- You only know his co-workers by their last name and you are clueless when they use someone's first name!

- You count the days until they get home by X days...and a wake up!

-  When after about 3 years you are itching to move somewhere new.

- Hurry up and wait! Need I say more?

Feel free to add more! :)

The Silent Ranks

I wear no uniforms,
 No blues or army greens.
But I am in the military
In the ranks rarely seen.
I have no rank upon my shoulders.
Salutes I do not give.
But the military world
Is the place where I live.

I am not in the chain of command,
Orders I do not get.
But my husband is the one who does,
this I cannot forget.
I am not the ones who fires the weapon,
who puts my life on the line.
But my job is just as tough.
I am the one that is left behind.

My husband is a patriot,
A brave, a prideful man
And the call to serve his country,
 Not all understand.
Behind the lines I see the things needed
to keep this country free.
My husband makes the sacrifice,
but so do our kids and me.

I love the man I married,
Soldiering is his life.
But I stand among the silent ranks
know as the Military Wife.

I Don't Like Waiting

When you are waiting a day can feel like an eternity!

waiting ~ 

a period of waiting; pause, interval, or delay

patience ~

an ability or willingness to suppress restlessness or annoyance when confronted with delay

Yeah...I am not so good at the patience thing.... *sigh* 

Home From Georgia!

Had a great time with Alaia and family! Went to the homeschool expo, played a lot of Dominion, and had a lot of fun! :)

I am *almost* set for the year! Just a couple more things to get. Now, I get to plan and organize it all. I love this part!!

A Little Story.....

 I was told a story today about someone....we will call her.... an idiot :) Her words, not mine!

One hot summer day after a long drive to run errands, the gas tank was getting pretty low. Thinking she better get gas so she could make it home she stops at a Shell station. Needing to get home and not wanting to spend much money (which is hard with gas prices how they are) she hurries and only puts $20.05 in the tank. As she drives home she notices the gas door slightly open. She spends the next 20 minutes of the drive home wondering if she forgot to put the gas cap back on. She gets home and discovers she did in fact drive off without it. She walks in the door and announces....

"I'm an IDIOT!"

She also is wondering who does that kind of thing. I did not have an answer for her except to say that she does, apparently! *snicker*

Finally Saw Harry Potter Last Night

It was really good. I would like to see parts 1 & 2 together now and I want to read the book again. Someone I know really needs to read the books, not mentioning any names Alaia or anything.

It was nice getting out with my hubby too ♥